So finally my summer has passed, and it’s time for a new semester. However, it didn’t goes smoothly as I used to hope. The fact is… these weeks drive me crazy. I can’t believe I have a ton of work that I have to remember and do, along with stupid troubles that are needed to solve. Oh man! It pissed me off. And it causes a lot of stress that has still continued and piled up until today. I got tired for all of this. And more terrible, this gives me a lot of weird dreams at nights that I couldn’t make my sleep soundly. I always space out with no reason and feel boring, plus get impatient more often. I get more lazy, and just want to throw everything away so I don’t have to care about them. At some time like this, what I like is playing games, but the games (well yeah, now I’m playing Elsword Online) doesn’t make me satisfied (In truth, I feel like bursting out because the gameplay now of people is not nice. A lot of weird things happen in the game and people’s gameplay and strategies are quite… stingy) so I don’t usually play games now. How’s about chatting with people? No. I don’t have many friends that I want to talk to and I don’t like communicate directly either. Moreover, when I’m in trouble, I avoid to talk to people whom I feel about like they can’t sympathize with my emotion. Well, yes, it’s horrible to keep silence and bury your own feelings without sharing but for me, it’s better a lot to suffer alone than sharing but after that feeling what you tried to do is in vain. Sometimes I hope to find someone can hear and understand me but ending up finding out that my stories is just a nonsense and annoying story for them, and they even can laugh without thinking and gave me give me stupid advice that is so common and hollow. For them the trouble I have is just a trivial matter but for me, it’s serious. Maybe I’m quite strict but who knows, the serious side in me is something that helped me until now, to gain respect (perhaps it’s just my thought).
That’s why after all that, I ended up letting myself engulf in my passion of drawing. I use most of my free time at home to draw, to sketch, and to CG. When I do that, I feel like I can live and be optimist that I can let my troubles pass through and be solved later. It may sound like stupid and daydreaming but that’s my way. I don’t care if people like them or not. I feel comfortable and I’m pleased to live in ‘my world’.
So, I think we should end the story of mine here. I have something to show in this blog, or what I could do in my last days of summer. I love them.
First, my new ID for DA gallery. I know it’s not so nice and the line is not flexible or something like that but at least, it’s not so bad. Yeah, I’m drawing myself but of course in real life, I’m not so beautiful or cute like that (just so-so^^;). To be honest, I’m more like a tomboy. I like simple appearance and strong thought and personality. I like coolness, and people say that my face is quite poker too, or emotionless Lol. This pic, I just wanted to try the sparkling eyes that’s seen very often in shoujo manga, but since I draw boys and action more, it has the sense of shounen more instead. And the BG, just love coloring circles.
Second, oh my, this is the mark of my improvement this year:
I lost my original size at first, but fortunately, I had taken a photo of the WIP screen so I still got the lineart to color Lol, and it even turned out more impressive than I thought. Well, this is an art-trade for AlicePyxis, one of my DA friends. I wanted to draw my RF and her CN in a soft romantic scene and I was so satisfied because finally I could draw my in-game model (thought it’s not full body but I think it’s better). It didn’t took me so much time either, thought it has some difficult spots to CG. And I got better in BG and effect too. I just testing brushes on SAI and use a little trick on Elements 9 to emphasize the light source, and then it became extremely good. I was even more happy when people like it. Well, it’s the first time I have so many favorite adding in a very short time like this one. Thanks to this time drawing, I learn a lot of new things in making good effect and using colors.
And the third. Hah, a WIP from a long time ago that I used to post my 50% WIP here in one of my blog. It’s a meme that I really really wanted to do, and I like it because it has been a long time since I last draw… like this. They are all my very first OC when I started liking to do design by myself, mostly because of the inspiration from MMZ and MMZX series. When I drew them, I felt like I could see my old days and my old passion again, from the days I used pencil to the time I first got my tablet and used it until the day I ‘made friend’ with my current Intuos 4. For me they are the best designs that I used to do and create, and to be honest, though now my skill is better a lot than before but I still feel hard when drawing them Lol (dunno why but I always make silly mistakes^^;). I love them!
Yes, and it’s the last pic of my summer. I completed it one day before the first days I went back to school. Of course now I’m still drawing but for this post, I think it’s enough.